Tuesday, November 15, 2005
I hate relationships. Everyone enters the honeymoon period and then after a few months, things just change. Once they know they have you, they stop caring about your pain or feelings and start focusing on what they want and keeping YOUR mouth shut so you're there but dont have any influence on their decisions.
Love can be so great, to bad it doesnt last.
Wednesday, September 28, 2005
You know sometimes life throws you something perfect and special and then for some unknown reason, its' taken away from you.
I don't know if it's a test or a punishment.
But I do know that I have the most amazing thing in the world, and it's going away.
I will survive but I am hating every breath I take before he leaves, and I will hate every breath after he leaves. Why can't life just be not dramatic for one god damn mother f*cking second?
Friday, September 02, 2005
There are few people in this world that have been able to influence me to grow and better myself as a person. I have had issues with men for along time, infact I gave up, I decided to use them the way they used me.
BUT, I met not only the most amazing man, but also my greatest friend. I love my boyfriend-more than anything. Being best friends for 4 months before dating was the greatest idea, he became my best friend before he became my man.
ANTHONY I LOVE YOU, HAPPY 2 MONTH ANNIVERSARY
♥
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
Oh man sometimes I hate my job, other times i just don't like my job. Why do bosses have to be such pricks sometimes. I have so much responsibility in my job and covering four offices with just two people adds up to alot of sh*t between us. I wish people would stop being so lazy, get their sh*t done and BITE ME. Plus, why is it that when things go wrong, sh*t hits the fan. AGHHH. Ok i feel better now.
NEW PICS..... NEW PICS......07/4/05
I love you D.
Wow- things are insane. Several changes happened last night:
1. I'm no longer single.
a. Yeah how insane is that? I'm not single anymore, "nah not me, I'm a player always will be "(former way of thinking). Apparently, there are men out there that are 100% real and honest about themselves and life. When some f*cking way I just found one.
2. I got my girls to go on vacation this weekend and I got Tuesday off as well.
a. Yeah I'm going to Lake Chelan to party with all these people and I got my two best friends to go. It's going to be awesome, my girl crew is going to kill it.
I'm going to come back hungover, tan, and tired as hell, but whatever thats what 4th of July is about.
I love skating.
I love laughing.
I love being in control.
I love snowboarding.
I love my girl crew.
I love sunny days.
I love frosty beer.
I love sex.
I love all my friends.
I love that im an adult and I can sit back and enjoy all the things listed above, with relatively NO DRAMA!
YEAH MY LIFE ROCKS!
GOD I LOVE THIS GOD DAMN SONG.
"Open my eyes just to have them closed once again
Don't want control
As it takes me down and down and down again
Is that the moon or just a light that lights this dead-end street?
Is that you there or just another demon that I meet?"
"The higher you are
The farther you fall
The longer the walk
The farther you crawl
My body, my temple
This temple, it tilts
Step into the house that Jack built"
Wow- I SO F'IN NEED A BEER RIGHT NOW.
My managers SUCK.
OK TODAYS POLL IS:
WHY DO YOU THINK GIRLS HATE OTHER GIRLS SO MUCH?
WHOOOOOO HOOOOOO.....Everyone have a F*CKING AWESOME MEMORIAL WEEKEND!!!!
TIME TO SERIOUSLY PARTTTTTTTTTYYYYYYY!!!!!
No one blow themselves up on their boats, dont get too hammered and f*ck an ugly person, and dont drive drunk...but besides that.... GO GET CRAZY!!!
See you guys on the water!
OK FIRST OF ALL: I HAVE MAD RESPECT FOR THOSE WHO BELIEVE FAITH IN GOD OR WHATEVER A PERSONS BELIEF SYSTEM IS.
HOWEVERRRRR........DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT PUSH YOUR sh*t ON ME, AND DONT DISS MY LIFESTYLE BECAUSE OF YOUR BELIEFS.
I HAVE ALOT OF FRIENDS WHO ARE STRONG INTO THEIR BELIEFS AND LIVE THEM EVERYDAY, WHICH IS ONE REASON WHY I LOVE THEM, BUT WHEN YOU START TRYING TO PUSH IT INTO MY LIFE...YOURE GONE.
IF YOU DISS MY LIFESTYLE AND/OR PUSH YOUR RELIGIOUS BELIEFS ON ME....I WILL BLOCK YOU INSTANTLY...
Ok I have reached my all time high of HATING girls. GOD WHY COULDNT I HAVE BEEN A DUDE?
Thank god I have self restraint....that bitched two weeks ago who pushed me off a stage and made me tear my calf muscle and sprain my foot was lucky that I didn't beat her face unrecognizable. Or the fact that the girls with me didn't f*ck her up.
If i could have one wish....I'd ask that all the girls in the world would stop acting like everyone owes them something, stop being psychotic bitches, and decide to do something with themselves instead of hunting down dudes to take care of them and then attacking girls like me who want the least amount of drama possible and dont need four pounds of makeup to feel good about themselves.
And to the girls out there who are you cool...thank you for giving me some reason to not give up on the female species all together!
GIRLS IT IS OK TO HAVE SEX WITH A DUDE WHO IS NOT YOUR BOYFRIEND, IT IS OK TO BE A PLAYER, IT IS OK TO MAINTAIN YOUR DIGNITY AND RESPECT WHILE DEMANDING WHAT YOU NEED:
Great amazing not dramatic sex.
(this only applies if you're over 21) he he
You are not a slut. Dont let others religious beliefs or jealousy make you change who you are or what you want.
Guys are sluts why cant we be?
Be protected and respect yourself..
do it do it....my friends know what the hell im talkin bout! SPENCY SHOUT IT..FRENCH TOAST! LOL
Wednesday, April 27, 2005
SO I DID IT MY WAY LAST NIGHT, OPENED MY MOUTH A FEW TOO MANY TIMES BUT IT'S GOOD HE NEEDS TO BE PUT IN HIS PLACE, MAKES HIM WORK HARDER.
I FEEL LIKE DEATH THIS MORNING THOUGH...
TO MANY SHOTS OF TEQUILA, REDBULL, CIGS AND ROUGH SEX CAN WEAR A PERSON OUT!
HAVING A SERIOUS DISCUSSION ABOUT YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE IS HARD AS IT IS, ID SUGGEST NOT DOING IT AFTER THE ALCOHOL THOUGH. FORTUNATELY KEVIN IS MATURE AND WAS PATIENT WITH MY DRUNKEN STUPOR...SNAPS TO HIM.
YESTERDAY WAS ONE OF THOSE DAYS WHERE EVERY THING THAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG...DID.
I EVEN TRIPPED ON A CURB AND BIT THE CEMENT WHILE IN MY WORK CLOTHES!!!
MY FAVORITE QUOTE OF THE DAY WAS FROM MY FRIEND IN AA:
" NO OFFENSE GUYS BUT YOU'RE ALL f*ck UPS, AND IM THE BIGGEST f*ck UP OF ALL OF US."
HAHAHAHAH LAUGHED SO HARD MY GUMS HURT.
KEVIN HAS NOW SOMEHOW GOTTEN ME TO FORGIVE HIM AGAIN. BUT IM NOT PUTTING UP WITH ANY MORE BS....I DONT CARE WHAT THE HELL HE WANTS AS LONG AS I GET SOME AND HE KNOCKS OFF THE DRAMA BS.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH....ok I guess I lied KEVIN DOESNT ROCK....MOST DUDES ARE SUCH F*CKING PRICKS.
I USED TO PULL OUT MY IRISH TEMPER ON ANY ASSHOLE WHO'D PISS ME OFF OR HURT ME OR WHATNOT BUT ACTUALLY IVE REALIZED THESE DUDES DONT EVEN DESERVE IT. F*CK UM.....
AND NO KEVIN I WILL NOT SLEEP WITH YOU THIS WEEKEND AS PLANNED...MAYBE YOU'LL THINK TWICE WHEN ACTING LIKE A DAMN FOOOOOL.
-CHAMPAS- WHAT THE F*CK IS YOUR PROBLEM?
GROW THE F*CK UP. YOURE ACTING LIKE A TOTAL FEMALE.
WOW- KEVIN F*CKING RULES. ITS BEEN ALONG TIME SINCE IVE BEEN IN THIS SPOT....ITS F*CKING INSANELY RADDDDDDDD............
oh yeah and i have to mention that the girl in my AA class is f*ckin crazzzzzy. heheh.
god I can be such a total bitch at times.
Being in a terribly bad mood the last week I was a total ass to a friend of mine who didn't deserve it.
So to James...i am very sorry. I hope my maniacal bitchiness didn't completely ruin our friendship, although I can't say I'd blame you.
GOD I LOVE GREEN DAY AND METALLICA.
ok my friends think im crazy but in S&M Metallica album in the song "One" at 4min and 55 seconds when they say the following:
no....no....NO NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOO(screaming)
it makes me wanna skate, break something, f*ck something and drink something all at the same time... Amazing feeling...
at the bar when I request Metallica on the jukebox, i put my ear up to the speaker and close my eyes. I consider myself lucky to feel something strong enough to make me wanna cum. lucky me hey! ( please ignore if under 18yrs of age ha)
OK IM BACK FROM MY GRAMPS FUNERAL IN CALI.
It feels like I've been gone for a long time.
Its amazing the things that go thru you're head while you're taking a 19 hr road trip with your mom and brother( both of whom you dont associate with).
Although my gramps passing is super painful for me, driving his golf cart around his country club home with my bro totally smashed and driving balls in the sunshine made me feel a little better. It's sad when you're only vacation in like two years is your papa's funeral. But he was the COOLEST man alive and I know he's proud of me...and I THANK GOD HE DIDNT SEE MY GOLF SWING!!!
I walk a lonely road
The only one I’ve ever known
Don’t know where it goes
But it’s only me and I walk alone
I walk this empty street
On the blvd of broken dreams
Where the city sleeps
And im the only one
And I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk alone.
My shadows are the only one that walks besides me
My shallow heart is the only thing that’s beatin
I'm leaving for CAli tomorrow to go say goodbye to my grandfather at his funeral. So I'll probably be gone off this for awhile.
Wednesday, March 30, 2005
Well- I got the news of my grandpas passing yesterday. I went home dropped to the floor bawling and then threw up.
I keep hearing people tell me he's in a better place and he is happy. I already know that.......
It's not where he is that is destroying me inside, it's that the man who take care of us growing up is gone....I just talked to him and although he was sick he was pissed they wouldn't give him his golf cart back. he he. He taught me how to drive on that damn golf cart.
He is gone and my heart is black...........
yes yes yes Scott is back in town!
Last night was nutz. Christa is so funny when she's drunk. She kept giving me lap dances at the bar and ended up pushing my chair back all the way across the room. I was laughin so hard I thought I was going to throw up.
My best friend in the whole world is pregnant! Yeah I'm going to be an auntie! God a little Amanda...look out- the world can always use another hot cowgirl!
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