since my grand parents died christmas has kind of lost its sparkle it
was their holiday we went over to their house and opened presents and
grandma always got me just what i wanted and on christmas she was so
happy so was my grandfather the were so full of life now that my other
grandparents live near us we go over ther but now it feels like we are
bastardizing the holiday last year i got five hats i don't need that
many and make up i don't wear any makeup except if i buy it myself
rouge lipstick come on i like burts bees chapstick and maybe a lip
gloss but of course i smile and say thank you and in a week drop it off
at a second hand store or give it to some little kid let there mother
deal with rouge lipstick.
i just wish that they didn't try to recreat the past its enough that i
think about my deceased grandparents every christmas i just wish that
they would ask me what i wanted because they don't have the gift my
grandmother had of just knowing (she knew because she knew me we went
shopping together and just spent time together) my other grandparents
barely talk to me but to make sure that i am not depressed and that i
am being busy. but i will smile and i will say thankyou and wait
for another christmas to pass and who knows maybe this year won't be so
bad
